Performance Coach #172: Toby Jenkins - The Power of Psychological Flexibility

Season #6

Welcome to Episode #172 of The Coaching Podcast! This week, we’re thrilled to be joined by Toby Jenkins, a dynamic executive coach, speaker, Olympian, and entrepreneur with a mission: to change the world’s relationship with suffering. Toby’s journey has taken him from the Olympic pool to the boardroom, where he’s helped shape the mental resilience of everyone from military elites to tech founders. In our conversation, we explore the transformative power of psychological flexibility, discuss what it means to shift from 'harder, tougher, stronger' to a mindset of alignment, and dive into the nuances of performance behavior and acceptance commitment therapy. Get ready for an episode packed with deep insights and powerful tools to elevate your coaching approach.

  • 1.45: What position in AFL would you like to play?
  • 2.28: How did you discover water polo and what’s your first early memory of a coach?
  • 4.58: What was your experience of mental toughness as it relates to being an Olympian? Inspired by the awesome foursome and specifically Mike McKay (spelling) who had written on the bottom of the boat:
    • Who – If not me, who?
    • Now – If not now, when?
    • Goal – Gold medal
  • 8.21: Stoic Philosophy (Choice of Response) - The only control we have is the choices that we make. “If we can’t control our reaction, how do we choose our response.”
  • 9.05: Psychological Flexibility
    • “As an Olympian – I thought I needed to be harder, tougher, stronger.”
    • How can we help people rather than run through brick walls, instead, how do we help them become trampolines?
    • This is the core shift in perspective of the performance mindset.
    • “Buddha said that life is suffering and I tend to agree!” So how do we open up to that, acknowledge that, and still experience the joy?
  • 11.35: What would you say to the coach who has had success with the ‘harder, tougher, stronger’ approach? It’s one tool in the coaching toolkit. It’s not the absence of one, it’s the presence of both.
  • 13.26: Defining Psychological Flexibility as your ability to shift your attention. Derived from ACT which stands for:
    • Acceptance Commitment Therapy
    • Open up, be present, and do what matters because performance behavior is contextual.
  • 15.32: Performance Behavior is defined as doing the thing that is less comfortable.
    • ACT talks about moving towards behavior (short-term pain) and not positive and negative behavior.
  • 18.36: Insights on balance (trade-offs) versus alignment (compounding)?
  • 21.07: Key lesson - The most important work is never done (they are a set of practices).
  • 24.01: Time Management - It is a non-renewable resource.
  • 28.19: Sacrifice versus choice.
  • 31.37: What makes a great coach?
    • 1) Questions - "What if this was the last time?"
  • 33.11: Disruptive coaching idea that will change the way we coach in 2030?
    • AI may provide a coach for people in their pocket to accelerate the development of humans.
  • 35.22: Toby’s purpose: To change the world’s relationship with suffering.
  • 41.08: Crucible moment

To learn more about becoming a workplace coach or advancing your coaching skills, visit: www.coachem.cc or email: [email protected] 

About Toby Jenkins

Toby is a husband, father, Olympian, executive coach, award-winning entrepreneur, and author. His purpose is to change the world’s relationship with suffering. He’s worked with a diverse group, from Olympians to business leaders, from military elites to tech founders. (Find out more about his coaching.) Toby has spoken to thousands of people in life and broadcast audiences around the world at organizations such as Google, Ernst & Young, Rio Tinto, and the Australian Institute of Sport. (Find out more about his speaking.) He’s married to Lucy and father to Beatrix, Heidi, and Zoe. His favorite thing is writing about himself in the third person.

Connect with Toby

Website: https://www.tobyajenkins.com/
The Monday 3 Newsletter: https://www.tobyajenkins.com/newsletter/ 
Insta: @tobyjenkins
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tobyjenkins/